I Think I've Found the Problem

This year has been a great year for starting (and stopping, and then re-starting in some cases) some new habits. A notable one is to kickoff morning in solitude with a book about success and an exquisite, hot cup of coffee.

This month I'm reading The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. If you haven't, I truly recommend getting a copy and digging in.

Today as I slurped my way through my coffee (and unfortunately I do slurp) with my eyes glued to the page I read about Success Principle Number 50: Tell the Truth Faster and it reminded me of a really, funny story. 

If only … I had read that chapter some time ago.

Come to think of it, coffee was involved then too! In fact, coffee was the steamy protagonist.

The cast was small. Coffee. Keyboard. One elbow. First the elbow met the coffee and then coffee introduced herself himself itself to the keyboard. It was downhill after that.

I mopped up the mess, blotted the keyboard, disposed of the empty cup (sadly) and the paper towels and got back to work. At least that was the plan, but ...

kkkkkkkkkkk .@#^ KKKK. wsaaaaaaa……. ,,,é

Work wasn’t going so well and my keyboard was definitely not cooperating. In fact it seemed to be a little jittery.

Did I say, "Help, I spilled coffee all over my keyboard!" to the IT person? No! I figured the evidence was gone and I was too embarrassed. I figured no one would notice. How many times have you said that and regretted it?

I really, really did think that. Looking back, I don’t even see how I did.

IT to the rescue! Sure enough he notices the odd, random misfiring of my keyboard. This has nothing to do with coffee. The smart gent picks up up and turns it over and out pours a river of coffee and without missing a beat he says “I think I’ve found the problem.”

I have to say I was really impressed with his deadpan humor.

If I had only read Success Principle 50 back then I would have saved myself some serious embarrassment.

The Two Models of the World, aka Is Your Worldview Working Against You?

I hear the term worldview bandied about as often as Starbucks serves cold, refreshing iced caffè lattes at the drive thru in Las Vegas. That's pretty often.

I'm more interested in how useful the worldview is ... or is not. Is your worldview as handy as discovering your spare is flat like a gluten-free coconut flour brick pancake? Or is it more like discovering you have this inner MacGuyver who's ready to go build a shopping mall with a stick of gum and a toothpick? (If you don't know who MacGuyver is that's fine, just picture Jason Bourne, he could probably build a strip mall with a stick of gum and a toothpick too).

In FasterEFT training we learn about two world views: the lower model and the upper model.

We are born into this world wholly and completely defenseless. From day zero through seven years old we are learning machines, downloading all our experiences to the great storage device that is our unconscious mind. Experiences impact us. We depend on others for survival, food, shelter. We look to our caretakers for everything. The end result is a belief system, a worldview. A worldview that the power is outside of us: they are doing it to me, power is outside of me.

After our sponge like, immature child-like brains form that worldview it seems to become stuck in cement. A least action pathway.

It would be wonderful if there was a ceremonious graduation and you entered the upper model worldview amidst pomp and circumstance, getting your own shiny key to a whole new worldview as you threw your cap into the air. The sad truth is that most people never leave the lower model of the world.

Blame. Helplessness. Hopelessness. Powerlessness. Frustration. Anger. Resentment. 

Emotions of the lower model of the world.

Fortunately there is another option, an "I am the boss of me" worldview. The upper model.

The upper model embraces the knowledge that we have how-to-programs inside of us that are based on our stored pictures, sounds, feelings, and emotions. Accepting this we can choose our response. The power to do so is inside of us. No one can make us feel something without our participation. It really is an inside job. We have to think the thoughts (no one is listening to me) and feel the feelings (rejection, alone, sad ...).

Two people can share an experience and have reactions that are as different as a mint green Vespa is from a shiny red Toyota. For instance, say Fran and Jane are at work. In comes Stan, the boss, who is in a mood. You know those kinds of moods. We've all been there. Stan says some things and leaves.

Fran remarks, "Wow Stan having a bad day or what"? and somersaults back into spreadsheets and numbers. Unfazed.

Jane on the other hand turns red (that nuclear meltdown special kind of red), gets angry, says "How dare Stan say that?" and goes off to eat some donuts to calm down. Then she replays it in her head a few bazillion times and blames Stan for making her feel bad. Stan isn't in the room anymore which means Stan isn't making Jane feel anything. Jane's internal representations of Stan are creating her feelings.

Two responses. Two different worldviews. Upper model. Lower model.

Knowing about these two options isn't a guarantee you'll always choose the upper model (you knew it wouldn't be that easy right?).

Personally I strive to operate from the upper model of the world, now that I know it exists. But there are times, oh there are times ... I catch myself, literally, both feet slogging through mud, smack-dab in the middle of the lower model. I witness the thought "He/she/it made me feel ..." and at that point I have to step back and take the reigns before that riderless horse gallops any further off the reservation.

That's the time to use my FasterEFT skills to change what I'm saying/seeing/doing inside of me. It's simple, not easy, and oh so worth it.

Free. Choice. Happy. Calm. Peaceful. Gratitude. 

Emotions of the upper model of the world.

When you let yourself choose, you step into the upper model of the world. The food is way better there.